We have heard the adage “God makes the man and breaks the mould” -
meaning, no two persons are identical in all aspects namely thoughts,
actions, perception of things and so on. This is true of even the
identical-looking twins. This is the basis for biometrics. It is thus
obvious that comparison with others is not the right thing to do.
However, comparisons happen all the time around us. Sometimes a parent
says “Your older brother/sister was not like this.” The school teacher
says “Your brother was better in mathematics.” and so on. Forget others
comparing us with someone else, we also compare ourselves with others.
The factors of comparison are generally the looks, wealth, career,
intellect and achievements. Generally in comparisons, we look at others’
strengths and our own weaknesses. Too much of comparison takes away our
happiness. Since success happens out of our strengths and failures
happen out of our weaknesses, we should rather look inwards than look at
others for comparison. The ideal thing would be to count our own
strengths and work not them. Here is an interesting story.
There was a dog which lived a happy life. One day, as it was walking
around in a zoo, it saw a deer grazing grass. The dog thought “Wow, look
at that deer. It looks so beautiful. It must be the most luckiest
animal. I wish I was like a deer.” It felt sad that it did not look as
beautiful as the deer. It went to the deer and told so. The deer said “I
thought I was the luckiest till I met the bear. It is so furry and
warm. It looks cuddly. I’m thin and lean. I wish I was like the bear.”
The dog went to the bear and repeated what the deer told him. The bear
said “I don’t think I’m lucky. I think the elephant is the luckiest. It
is so big and majestic. It has such a long trunk. It can spray water on
itself and play so much more!” The dog went to the elephant and told him
what the bear said. The elephant said “What are you saying?? I’m not
the luckiest. I think the lion is the luckiest. It is called the King of
the jungle. It has such a beautiful mane and looks so royal. I wish I
was like the lion.” The dog went to the lion and said “You are the King
of the jungle. You are the luckiest animal”. The lion said “I have been
watching you for a while. I was actually thinking that I wanted to be
like you. I may look like the King. But what is the use? I’m caged here
in the zoo. But, look at you. You are free to walk around, go wherever
you want and eat whatever you want. You are indeed very lucky!”
Comparison in a limited sense is not bad. It helps structure our goals
and troubleshoot to evaluate the steps towards efficiency of reaching
our goals in life. “If someone’s reflexes are good, your analytical
abilities may be better; if someone’s memory is good, your problem
solving abilities may be great; if someone’s confidence is good, your
kindness towards others may be great.”
The world has millions of people. One may not always be the best in the
field of one’s work. Everyone cannot take the first position in a
particular field. But everyone can reach his/her best and contribute
towards the growth of that particular field. This is possible when one
looks at one’s own self than look at others for comparison. Different
jobs require different strengths, competencies and attitudes. For
example, a priest in a temple has to pray for every devotee who comes
and offer blessings independent of whether the devotee is a King or a
beggar. He has to be kind and courteous. A police officer dealing with
criminals cannot be mild, over-courteous or emotional. He has to be
tough to deal with criminals. The requirements for the priest and the
police officer are different. In a social structure, where millions of
people live together, every role is important and a person taking up
each role has to acquire the specific personality. Here is an
interesting story.
Simhendra was a brave and empathetic King. His Kingdom was attacked
several times by the enemy, but he always won the battle and protected
his Kingdom. People in his Kingdom were very happy. After one such
battle with an enemy, Simhendra was tired. There was something that was
bothering him. He decided to meet a saint who lived in the forest to get
some peace of mind. The next morning, the King left alone to the forest
to meet the saint. When he reached the saint’s ashram, the saint was in
deep meditation. He looked very calm and serene. The King felt inferior
looking at the saint. When the saint finished his meditation and came
to see the King, Simhendra said “Oh Blessed one, it is so nice to meet
you. You look so peaceful. I feel so worthless compared to you. I have
always done good to my people. I have protected them and provided what
they need. I have never done anything bad that I know of. But, when I
look at you, why do I feel so little?” The saint smiled and said “Why
don’t you rest? You have just come back from a battle. Spend time here
and leave by the evening. I will answer your question later.” Simhendra
agreed and stayed in the ashram the whole day. By evening, there was a
cool breeze and the moonlight shone brightly up in the sky. Simhendra
felt relaxed. The saint came to Simhendra and said “Oh dear Simhendra,
look at the beautiful moon. Look at the forest, it looks so serene in
the moonlight. But by tomorrow morning, the moon goes away and the sun
is up in the sky. Sun gives us bright light. You can see the forest
clearly. Both the sun and moon have their own beauty! Each has different
characteristics unique to them. Just because they both give light, it
doesn’t mean they have to be alike. We need to understand, appreciate
and respect each one’s existence.” Simhendra felt enlightened and bowed
to the saint.
One of the take-aways from this story is that what Albert Einstein once
said “Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by its ability to
climb a tree, it will live its whole life believing it is stupid.”
Thanks to Dr. H S Nagaraja
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